Posted by: The Chhamanator | August 21, 2008

Frequently asked questions about Mizoram, Part I

Hailing from a remote part of the country, I get a lot of strange and sometimes funny questions about Mizos and Mizoram. In fact, it sometimes surprises me that so many highly educated people know so little about my home state. Ask anyone from outside the North East to pinpoint the exact location of any of the seven North Eastern states and chances are they will get it wrong. So, to fight the dark curse of ignorance that dwells in the minds of many non-North Easterner, here is a compilation of the questions people ask me about Mizoram and the Mizos and the answers to those questions:

Q1. Do you know martial arts?

A: Actually, some people may find this question racist. Just because we look like Jackie Chan, Jet Li or Bruce Lee does not mean that we can kick asses like they do. Yes, martial arts is quite popular in the state but a majority (i’m guessing in the range of 70% at least) wouldn’t be able to differentiate between judo and taekwondo.

Q2. (Brings some chinese, japanese or any chinese-looking writing) Can you read this?

A: Again, resembling a race doesn’t magically make us masters of linguistics. Most Mizos probably wouldn’t be able to differentiate between Japanese and Chinese. After all, we don’t keep asking you to read Kannada, Tamil, Malayalam, Oriya or Bengali just because you look like the people who use them do we?

Q3. Can you write my name in the Mizo script?

A: Yes, but it’s gonna look exactly like English. You see, the Mizos do not have their own written language and it is the British Missionaries who gave us the Mizo script we use today and they based it on their own script.

Q4. Are your politicians as bad as ours?

A: Most politicians are assholes. Mizoram politicians are no different. The main difference is that most of our politicians are upstanding members of the church and the society unlike in many parts of India where the politicians are convicts, rapists, murderers and illiterate idiots. So, basically, while you are screwed by criminals, rapists and illiterate idiots, we get screwed by Professors, businessmen, doctors and Church elders.

Q5. Are you veg or non-veg?

A: Most Mizos are non-vegetarians. And we eat all kinds of meat, actually. The average non-vegetarian will eat pork, mutton, beef, chicken and fish. Then there are those who eat rats, dogs and even snakes. But contrary to the writings of some high-risk engineers like Maneka Gandhi, animals are never tortured before being killed.

Q6. What is the main industry of Mizoram?

A: I have no idea. If you mean how we get our money, we have a bunch of ministers who regularly went to Delhi to ask for money from the Central government. I guess they are the main industry of Mizoram.

Q7. Are Mizo girls hotter than other Indian girls?

A: Yes, of course.

Q8. What curse words/insults do you use in the Mizo language?

A: None, really. Sandman has done a very comprehensive study on this topic. Visit his blog for more details.

That concludes part 1 of the FAQs. Questions and suggestions from Part 2 are welcome.

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Responses

  1. Love itttttt!!! *GRIN*

    I too once thought about writing a similar post like this but eventually didn’t. Now I’m sure glad I didn’t coz I wouldn’t have been able to be as funny as you.

    Love the politicians and kung-fu bit! 😀

  2. Thanks. Always nice to be praised by the master 🙂

  3. ha!ha!ha! a concise guide for a dummy.you have got amusing idea there.post some more of this

  4. Hahaha….
    Tha khawp mai…tinge maw ni le kungfu thiam tura an ngaih vek le dulkiar deuh2 te pawh hi….lolz
    mizoram industry khi dik hmel fu…agriculture tih kha han belh zeuh ta la a mawi hnaiah…

  5. Good post.Next time they question you about martial arts,i advise you to say that you are a good one,in fact, a black belt:) then you have a very less chance of getting physically attacked.hehe.

  6. @muvanlai, wonderboy and cinnamon apple
    Thanks for the comment and the advice. It was much appreciated. And I’ll definitely say I’m a black belt from now on 🙂

  7. “Q7. Are Mizo girls hotter than other Indian girls?

    A: Yes, of course.”

    Thank goodness…and Amen

  8. @opahmar, Amen to your Amen

  9. […] a great blog post by my friend “The Chhamanator” entitled: Frequently Asked Questions about Mizoram which I’m sure you’ll love too. Hilarious! Q1. Do you know martial arts? Q2. (Brings some […]

  10. fun & funny


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